Finding your soul partner

First published in Daily Tribune under Anthony Vivero's Vibes and Vision dated February 2, 2009.

Love, once again, is in the air as Valentine’s Day approaches. Yet for some it will still be a struggle to find their elusive soul mates or soul partners. The truth is, there are many ways to find them. The problem is we often fill our heads with so many distractions, quantifying and qualifying our wishes and desires for our dream partners, or becoming so engrossed with work and career that we forego the opportunities to be happy.

People also tend to look too far, only to miss or overlook the love he or she has been looking for in the first place. That person may just around the corner.

The relationship between soul mates may or may not be in a romantic or sexual sense. It is a belief in love and on being able to have an intimate, spiritual and perfectly compatible connection with someone else.

Important things to learn

1. Be intuitive rather than logical. Remember, there will never be an exact explanation of what a soul is because it is not located in our brain, but in our heart. When looking for your soul partner, let the heart feel the difference and ignore your brainwork.

2. Don’t look far. Most often, God has made sure that whether your soul partner can be recognized as the one or not, that singular person will be there for you in your life, assisting you and vice versa, for both of your survival on earth.

3. Perfection is your goal. Many search for the perfect man, the perfect girl, or the perfect partner, but they forget the true meaning of this partnership — whoever your current partner is, be together and work in tandem toward this “perfection.” This is everyone’s ultimate goal.

4. Wealth and looks are secondary. Many look for these top two qualities from soul partners. The truth is, it is immaterial whether he or she is wealthy and good-looking. What matters most is that you feel comfortable, complete and cared for with this person. Those are the “three Cs” used to recognize a soul partner.

5. Be yourself. Reinventing or acting/pretending to be other than who you really are just to be chosen as the soul partner of your target mate will cause more problems over time. In the end when you are already romantically involved or deeply engaged, frustration sets in and may eventually lead to hatred. Expressing your true self is the perfect way to advertise yourself for your targeted soul partner. There is no need for presumption and pretension.

6. Be patient. An individual usually sets a time frame when searching for a soul mate. Belief in soul matters indicates that time and space is irrelevant. Soul, love and spirit can conquer all because they are boundless and limitless. If you honestly believe that a soul partner will come to color your life, to complete you, to be with you till eternity, for sure, he or she will come. Your soul partner may come whether you are 10 years old or 80 years old. There is no time frame or age limit.

7. Problems are normal. Many think that soul partners are trouble-free. That is a myth. Actually a soul partner is somebody that will be with you to solve the problems that you two are encountering every now and then and more often than not, these problems are the results of either your partnerships’ doing or undoing. You two are bound to resolve these issues.

8. Don’t be too obsessed with the idea. Being too eager or desperate when searching for a soul partner will make you look unattractive to others. Intended mates tend to stay away with smirks on their faces. You will be avoided like the plague. It is pretty downgrading if one is looking for a mere physical partner in life, erroneously thinking that what you are doing is searching for a soul mate search. Cool it.

9. Believe in affirmation. Make a conscious effort in believing and anticipating the day you will both meet. Declare to the universe that one day you will meet, see, recognize and eventually be with your soul partner for the rest of your life.

10. Be recognized. The problem with finding one’s soul partner is recognition. It is not just recognizing your partner that is important, but that you also be recognized. Some make the mistake of thinking they had found their partner because they thought they recognized them, but they worked less to be recognized or overdid it to show/pretend to be the soul partner of the other party. One of the partner is not the real deal. This is then a half-baked partnership and won’t work. These are some of the causes of soul mate partnership fallacies that debunkers are wont to exemplify.

Secret ritual

This is a ritual you can do alone before Valentine’s Day or before the full moon of any month.

Count nine days backwards from Feb. 14 or the exact day of the full moon. In this case, this will be on Feb. 5.

Get a pink candle. Write your name and the name of the potential soul partner, or your name and a blank space for another name (if you do not know who he or she is) on a white strip of paper. Roll the strip of paper around the candle and use a pin to secure it.

For nine consecutive days, add another pin to the candle, one per day, so there will be nine pins stuck to the candle by the ninth day.

If all the pins remain pinned, the name you have written could be your most probable soul partner. If there is no name indicated, sooner than expected your partner will come into your life. If one pin falls off from the candle, then try another name or try again on the next full moon.

I believe in soul partnership. It is similar to a business partnership, where we can have both good and bad times. This partnership will also need to be nurtured. The relationship will depend on how we harmoniously work for our partnership’s sake. The difficulty in any kind of partnership, including soul partnership, is finding the right one who shares your interests, your thoughts and all the things you are, good and bad. Sincerity, loyalty and the willingness to accept that life do have series and cycles of problems and solutions. To me, the one who possesses these qualities and beliefs is the perfect soul partner.

Comments and suggestions may be forwarded to anthonyvivero@yahoo.com and anthonyvivero@hotmail.com.